June 01, 2011
"on reduction and wind from another side"
Honesty and an outspoken mind are some of the characteristics I adore most in people. When typing this, it is clear to me, that adoring and getting it, are in fact two different kind of shoes. After all the busy days in Fishbowl, the guests, the artwork and the extensive nights, my party cup is obviously more than full. Last night there was, once a again, a gallery visit, including a Martini Cocktail. Today this is it. A headache from hell; I am absolutely tired, feeling worn out and lacking any kind drive. Though I went back to painting yesterday, which has been great, I can not bring myself to even get close to it right now. While hiding in a bubble of silent whining and complaining, the man is running around like crazy. For hours. He is finishing up bill stuff, getting the laundry out of the machine, fresh linnen on the bed, walking the dog; little queen Annton is sitting in the studio wondering and hoping that her laziness remains undiscovered. You might have guessed, it didn't work out. It was pointed out very clear to me, that something is not equal. "Did you notice, I am doing it all and you, well, you do nothing." Yes, of course. I had noticed, but was so not prepared to actually hear it. Feeling caught in the act makes me start an argument sometimes or throwing my misery back as a deadly weapon. I came close, but did manage to swallow the pill, admitting that he is right. Just that. I simply understood, honesty needs respect to work out. And that a crappy day is what is it. No less, no more.