June 25, 2011

"no shade, no sleep, but some rain"

 
Waking up this morning has been actually midday and it still feels like I have slept far too little. Classical After-the-Show Phenomenon, so to say. For the first two days following a sucessful event, you'll probably find me rather euphoric, filled up with all new impressions and the delicious fact, that what had been in my head, worked out for real. I just adore this feeling. When turning to day three though, exhaustion hits and will follow me for some while. All the hours without sleep, last minute dramas, explanations and conversations during the show are just taking their toll. Don't get me wrong, I totally love all that, but it is hard work too and sometimes we tend to forget that, thinking about the creative process only as being our profession. With the exhaustion the doubts knock as well. All the ideas of what could have been better or more impressive and even harder to chew on, what could it be next. Over the years I have found out, however I might handle this process, it will not change the result. Sooner or later the ugly parts will kick in. I am best when working hard or being lazy to an extreme, those in between moods though, they are a killer for me. The more I will fight them, the meaner they'll fight back. So, I've decided to just let them come, hold my breath, and watch them disappear slowly. And have some chocolate and ice instead.

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